It’s amazing that it’s been now two years ince we’ve had the girls and been a family. Where has the time gone? How much bigger can these kids grow???

I was looking back to the first few days back in Canada after our extended stay in Ethiopia, and I couldn’t get over how little the girls were. I mean, they were just toddlers, really. And now they are off to school in the fall. How time does fly by…

We celebrate the day that Jrock came to Ethiopia and we were all together for the first time as our family day. That’s today!

So… Happy 2nd Family Day, girls!

Written by Ben Colcough for the Huffinton Post
original article here

Thanks Ben! Great article about one of the most beautiful countries in the world!

It isn’t exactly as accessible as Hilton Head Island, or even the Masai Mara for that matter, but Ethiopia deserves travelers’ attention.

One caveat: If you rarely venture beyond the Marriot, then this may not be too appealing to you. That being said, those who privilege comfort over experience will be missing out..

The thing is, Ethiopia is unlike anywhere else on earth. Get past the headlines about Brad and Angelina adopting Ethiopian orphans and you have a country of endless mountains, an insane number of UNESCO World Heritage sites, and a fascinating offshoot of the Christian church. Layer on that some of the world’s best coffee and a people who love nothing more than talking religion and politics and you have a brew for an incredible journey:

#1 Lalibela: Let’s start with the big hitters. Within the small town of Lalibela lies 13 churches cut by hand from the mountain, said to be an attempt to replicate Jerusalem by 13th Century King Lalibella. To avoid overdosing on adjectives, I’ll leave it to the voice of Portuguese priest Francisco Alvares in the 1520s “I weary of writing more about these buildings, because it seems to me that I shall not be believed if I write more … I swear by God, in Whose power I am, that all I have written is the truth”.

#2 Axum: The Ethiopian Orthodox Church (that being the main one in Ethiopia) claims to have the Ark of the Covenant locked away safely in a church in Axum. No-one outside a select few is allowed anywhere near it, so that leaves the casual visitor with the incredible array of huge stelae, ruined palaces and underground tombs to explore. The place is a veritable theme park for wannabe Indiana Jones’s

#3 The Simien Mountains: If I were to tell you that you could do a four or five day hike along a highland ridge with some of the most incredible views in the world while rare Gelada Baboons, graceful Walia Ibex and vast vultures clamour for your attention would you be interested? I thought so.

#4 The Lower Omo Valley: For anthropologists and tourists alike the Omo Valley is a rich kaleidoscope of tribal culture, a cross-road of early humanoid migrations. Nowhere else on Earth is there such variety of cultures within such a small area. Getting here isn’t easy, expect to spend a lot of time in the back of a 4wd on notoriously bad roads, but the markets and the cultures are fascinating.

#5 The Denakil Depression: This is for the seriously adventurous only. A long, jarring and hot journey from Addis takes you into the land of the Afar. The lowest point in Africa plays host to temperatures regularly exceeding 120 degrees Fahrenheit and an incredible illuminated volcanic landscape. The Afar have a notorious reputation for hostility to visitors (or trespassers depending on your view point). If you have a complaint about customer service, then this is not the place for a Lower Manhattan prima donna scene. Play it by the book though and you are rewarded with a fascinating people and a wild unforgiving inhuman wilderness. Camping on the rim of the live volcano is out of this world.

#6 The Harar High: The Lonely Planet talks of the unique ambience and says you’ll feel like you are “floating through another time and space” and there is truth in those words, but not in the way they mean it. Harar is undoubtedly a gem, an ancient Muslim walled City in the East of the country. The nightly Hyena feeding sessions feel touristy, but here lies a serious tradition. Back to the “time and space” point though. The thing the LP isn’t telling you is that Harare is notorious as a centre of chat culture. Chat is a mildly intoxicating relaxing and addictive narcotic. The streets of Harar are full of men chewing their way through a big bag of leaves floating through “another time and space” and it grants this City a rather unique ambience.

#7 The Guns: This is arguably a little unfair, but there is something unnervingly jarring about sitting on a bus and seeing locals clamber on with automatic rifles slung over their shoulder. Many Ethiopians, particularly in rural areas carry guns around with them all day every day, it is a cultural thing apparently and I never felt threatened, but still, peculiar, very peculiar.

#8 Lucy: There is a wonderful museum in the capital Addis Ababa that (sometimes) holds the bones of what once stood as the oldest ever discovered hominid, the 3.2 million year old Lucy. The museum is a fascinating anthropological diversion, but unfortunately for Ethiopians, she is currently on a 6 year tour of the States.

#9 Injera: Ethiopians eat Injera for breakfast, lunch and dinner and many would happily exist solely on this rather unusual dish. Imagine an ever so slightly bitter pancake the size of a man-hole cover piled. This is Injera. Spicy vegetarian and meat stews are heaped atop and diners proceed to tear at it, using it as plate, spoon and staple food all in one. The piece de resistance for many injera aficionados is injera firfir, which roughly translated is soggy injera stew served on a big piece of injera, a double helping at which I firmly draw the line.

#10 Religion: Religion is central to Ethiopian culture. Every single person I meet in Ethiopia asks me what my religion is. But it never stops there. An often unnerving belief in literal interpretations of Christianity combined with an unending questioning nature makes for fascinating conversations that are quite frankly out of my depth. For anybody bought up with a Western view of Christianity it is entirely refreshing seeing Jesus portrayed in ancient frescos in the likeness of an Ethiopian.

You may have heard about the droughts in Ethiopia, Kenya and Somalia. It’s important to hear what is going on, and how the NGOs and governments are responding.

You may ask what you can do to help people so far away, with such a huge crisis. First, you can donate to a food aid organization, such as Oxfam, Save the Children, the Red Cross/Crescent or UNICEF. Or, you could help one family in dire need through Vulnerable Children Society. You know, all these organization do invaluable work. I know from reports from our friends in Ethiopia that life is getting harder for everyday working folks, and extremely dire for those living on the edge of poverty.

The other consideration is to think about where all these droughts are coming from. I know this is an indirect connnection, but there is a lot validity behind climate change exaserbating the droughts, and making them happen more often. All scientists aside, I remember clearly speaking with farmers and elders in Ethiopia two years ago, and having them describe climate change to me and how remarked the difference in water cycles have been because of it. I tell you, it sort of blew my mind and humbled me. You think that sustainance farmers who haven’t studied past elementary school wouldn’t be aware. To the contrary; they taught me some hard lessons about the effects of a drying climate pattern on their livelihoods and forests.

Whatever the reasons, there is no doubt that there are a whole bunch of people hurting on the other side of the world. Hopefully all my blogging buddies will also tell their friends about the Horn of Africa food crisis, and encourage their friends and family to donate to one of the excellent organizaions above.

We can’t go ourselves to the Ethiopian Festival in Vancouver, because this day we have to be setting up our trailer in Naramata for the Harambe Camp. But hopefully some of you in the lower mainland of BC can go! Have a wonderful time!!

Our adoption from the Congo will be different in many ways from an Ethiopian adoption, as the countries are shockingly different.

• Ethiopia is a relatively peaceful country. The Congo is one of the most war-torn places on earth.
• We had a chance to travel about the Ethiopian countryside; when visiting the Congo, we will be restricted by safety to the capital. Too bad, since the Congolese jungle is supposed to be just breathtaking.
• Ethiopia was never colonized, so the people are easily accepting and open to Westerners. The Congo was colonized by Belgians and left in a sad state – I can only imagine there are tensions relating to that history.
• We have a wonderful Ethiopian community and some great Ethio friends; however, there is no significant Congolese community in our area.
• Our girls really don’t have any chance to learn Amharic where we live. But for our son, I can speak French and we will be able to put him in school.

• Hello – Mbote.
• Hello, Mama – Mbote na yo, Mama. (This is polite greeting for any
  adult woman a bit older than you, not just your own mother)
• Hello, friend – Mbote na yo, moninga.
• How is it going? – Ndenge nini?
• (It’s going) well. – Malamu.
• Are you doing well? – Ozali malamu?
• Yes, I’m doing well – Ee, nazali malamu.
• What’s new? – Nsango nini ? / Sango nini?
• Nothing’s new – Nsango te. / Sango te.
• See you later – Tikala malamu.

Many of you know that I am the President of Vulnerable Children Society and an avid supporter. We work with our partner, Faya Orphanage, to support children living in four communities in Ethiopia: Adama (where the orphanage is located,) Wonji, Ambo and Guder.

Our House 2 House community support program allows children to stay in their communities, often with extended family members or neighbors. With sponsorship, the children not only go to school, but receive medical care, get registered for ARVs (many of the children are HIV+), and have access to proper food and a family home, thanks to our family-direct subsidy. We work with local governments to identify and monitor the children, so you know that there are many levels of oversight and the children are indeed some of the most needy and deserving.

If you haven’t considered it before, please consider sponsoring a child in our House 2 House program. We need 50 more sponsors by the end of the year, and we can’t do that alone. Each child deserves a future. Please sponsor a deserving child.

Can you help a deserving child?

1. Please consider sponsoring a child. You know who the board members and partner are – your money is in good hands and will make a huge life-altering difference to your sponsored child and their family. Click here to learn more and sponsor.
2. If you can’t sponsor a child, please clicking your support!
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   3. Watch the video above on Youtube, “like” it, and post it to your own blog!
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Your support is so very very appreciated!!!!!!

Well, it’s taken a long time to learn how to make injera properly. Those who have been following my blog WAY back will remember that first I learned to make “cheaper injera” with bubbly water.

Then I went through the rigamorol of many Ethio-adoptive parents.. I watched every youtube video out there about injera. I learned that in Ethiopia you make a porridgy dough out of the injera and then add hot water… still! gummy injera. I even got pointers from an Ethiopia acquaintance, who incorporated 6 flours into her recipe. I EVEN bought an injera pan for $180.

Still – my injera sucked.

Enter my friend M. She makes THE BEST injera. I mean, her injera kicks many Ethiopian restaurants’ butts. And she only lives a few blocks away from me. Ethiopian’s from our community always congregate at her house for her food – no wonder. It’s just fantastic.

So one weekend, we set it aside for me to learn to make injera - her way. She said the methods they use in Ethiopia simply do not work here in North America. From her basement where she stores her flours, to her kitchen making starter and batter, and a day or so later, to my kitchen to cook it, I followed her… wrote down her instructions, and VIDEO-TAPED HER!

That’s right folks, we made an injera-making video! I plan on sometime this year putting it together as a movie and selling it as a fundraiser for Vulnerable Children Society. If you are interested in purchasing a copy of a “how to make injera in Nth. America” video when we produce it, leave a comment below!

But in the meanwhile, I am perfecting my technique, and teaching the girls. My “eyes” still aren’t quite wide enough in the injera (the sourdough holes) but overall, I have achieved very respectable and tasty injera. Yum! Thank you M!!!

I’ve been having some good discussions about parenting with first-generation immigrant parents, lately. I think we adoptive parents have a lot in common with them: we are trying to represent and incorporate a culture into our children’s lives that is different from the one they are primarily living in.

Of course there are difference, since Ethiopian /Oromo culture isn’t my culture, for example. But we have some of the same realities to face. Sharing a foreign culture with them and trying to make it meaningful to their contemporary Canadian lives.

I was at a birthday party for my closest Ethiopian friend’s sons last month. (Yes, that’s how behind the blogging I am!) Jrock and I were honoured to be the only non-Ethiopians (ferengi) invited. We really feel accepted and included in our small Ethio-Canadian community here in Kelowna. It’s just a joy. 

I was having a chat with a dad whose children (now grown) were born and raised in Canada. He is Eritrean (although, it was Ethiopia when he lived there,) and his wife is Tigrayan. They’ve lived in Canada for over 30 years.

He was telling me about raising his children with injera and Ethiopian holidays. He said, though, the first time he took his kids back to Ethiopia to see relatives, that the kids didn’t blend in at all. According to him, “they walked, talked, behaved, ate and played like Canadians. It was so obvious. Because that’s what they are.” He commented positively on the girls traditional dresses, but went on to caution me – “you can’t turn them into Ethiopians, you know. Because they are Canadian girls. They only look the same.”

This really gave me pause and made me think. I mean, I want the girls to have a connection to their culture. But, according to my acquaintance, they never really will be “Ethiopian.” Even his children, who were raised speaking Tigrayan and Amharic, never quite fit in in their parents’ home country.

That’s not to say my girls were be any less for the experience growing up in Canada. I guess I just realized from that conversation and a few others after that they are the members of a different club: Ethiopian-Canadians. Which means celebrating birthdays (a Canadian tradition) with injera and coffee ceremony (an Ethiopian tradition.) Hmmmmm…..

So – a question back out to my readers.

How have your ideas on your children’s identities and cultural affiliations changed since you have become parents? Do you think of your kids as Ethiopians (or Chinese, or wherever they came from,) or as Ethiopian-Canadians? Or just Canadians? And why?

There was an article released March 4th (and I’m not sure how trusted the news source is or not) that stated the following:

Ethiopia’s Ministry of Women’s, Children’s and Youth Affairs has issued a directive saying it will process a maximum of five inter-country adoptions a day, effective March 10. Currently, the ministry is processing up to 50 cases a day… the reduction of up to 90 percent in cases will allow closer scrutiny of documents used to verify a child’s orphan status.

Ministry spokesman Abiy Ephrem says the action was taken in response to indications of widespread fraud in the adoption process. Read more here…

Of course, I hope that the cutbacks in case volume will have the desired affect. But what I fear will really happen is that case will get more and more backlogged. Agencies will be so fiercly competitive to get case through court that there will be even more “reason” for fabricating stories (which does happen sometimes, by the way.)

Adoption pundits on the internet have been predicting the fall of Ethiopian adoption as the second biggest source of international adoptions for the last year or so - pretty much ever since the country got its second-place title.

I for one am really sad – not because we probably won’t have any more children from Ethiopia. Jrock and I had already come to terms with that quite some time ago.

But I feel for the children. Not to be calous – heartbreak aside; there will always be other children for Canadian families to adopt.) What really gets to me are the many many children in Ethiopia who don’t  have other options. They are at the end of the line. The social network has failed them. The streets are a dead end. They have no other option but to live life out in an orphanage. IF they are lucky.

For those children, I well up, thinking that they won’t get a chance at a family.

Vulnerable Children Society

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So a small ask today: Can you help us? No, I’m not asking for money! Just a simple click or two.

Will you help spread the word about helping kids in Ethiopia?

1. Please like us on Facebook!
2. “Like”, and then pass on any interesting posts to your friends and family by posting to their walls. We usually have new content and pictures out each Monday and Wednesday.
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THANKS very very much!!!!

Through our group, Okanagan Families with Children From Africa, we’ve made effort to connect with almost every one of the Ethiopian families in town. But cultural connections do not make for friendship – it takes more in common than that.

We have one really good set of friends who are Ethiopian. When we met our friends H and M, it was because their son was going to the same daycare as our girls. But over the last year or so, we’ve grown to become quite good friends, and have a lot in common. M even serves as a director on our Vulnerable Children Society board.

There are side benefits having Ethiopian Canadians in our lives… such as seeing all the small cultural practices brought to life. These pictures are of M doing coffee ceremony for some friends that are visiting.  The girls are practicing drinking with hot milk. These little interactions are so important for our girls… and they are at a level of cultural authenticity that I couldn’t ever achieve myself.

Note the spashes on their pants – it takes a while to learn to drink from a cup full of “coffee” (aka hot milk.) And I’ve learned it’s impolite not to fill to the line just below the brim, lol.

Anyway, we’re so grateful that some of our dear friends just happen to be Ethiopian.  Ove the next month, I’m taking Spice to speach therapy once a week and Sugar is going to stay at M’s house for a few hours. Sugar is our “little chef”, btw… maybe M will teach her to make some wats!

Mark, a friend of ours made this video from his recent trip to Ethiopia with his son – it’s wonderful! they traveled in the Northern mountains near Lalibela – somewhere I haven’t been. But now I have to go!

Mountains of Lalibela from Mark Kostelyk on Vimeo.

Mark picked up his Ethiopian kids around the same time as we picked our up in Ethiopia. We went to Faya Orphanage for the first time together and he’s just a really nice, laid-back guy. Guess you have to be with 7 kids. Still – ncie to see you again, even if it’s on video!

Just because I love the country of my children’s birth doesn’t mean I have to agree with all its customs.

Child marriage is a serius problem in rural areas of Ethiopia. Why is it such an issue? For several reasons – firstly, girls who get married at such a young age have much slimmer chances of getting and education. They also often get pregnant way too young, and suffer greatly physically. They are not meant to bear children so early in life, and can experience fistulas, miscarriages, and even death.

Again, I love many of Ethiopia’s customs… but early marriage (and female circumcision, for example,) are customs I’m glad my daughters’ don’t have to partake it.

Here is an interesting compilation of videos with street interviews in Axum, Ethiopia. Pretty fun and worth a look!

It’s the ultimate gift of love that keeps giving year round!

And Vulnerable Children Society will send an ecard for you, right up until noon on the 24th!

Whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or Genna, a December gift of love for a vulnerable child is sure to delight and warm the heart.

Show your loved one that you care about them, and about the children in Ethiopia at the same time. Sponsor a child in your friend or family member’s name… or make a one-time donation to Vulnerable Children Society to honour your loved one.

It’s as easy as 1, 2, 3! (Credit, debit and PayPal accepted!)
 JUST CLICK HERE!.

Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! Joyous Kwanzaa! Melkam Genna!